Abstract Art Layers: Lucky Ones

Why Art is More Than Just the Colors on the Canvas

Lucky Ones, 2024.
Mixed Media on Canvas - 12” x 12” x 1.5”

Art That Begins With Personal Context

Lucky Ones took on so many versions while painting. I experienced so much personally that I think it greatly affected my creative work. I remember adding layers and thinking I liked it or adding and thinking how much I hated it. There was no happy medium. It was a piece full of extremes.

During this process, I was diagnosed with ADHD and Autism. As a 45-year-old woman, it was both a surprise and an “ah ha” moment because I have always known I was different. Growing up in the 80’s, I was labeled early in school as gifted and high achieving, so schools provided enrichment and more challenging curriculum. As I grew older, I noticed that I was usually one of the few girls in my classes and had a much easier time befriending guys than girls. I wasn’t great with the drama and I never followed the social requirements of talking on the phone every night or sharing secrets with my best friend. Why would anyone do that? You can see the pattern.

The interesting thing is that no one thought of ADHD or Autism at the time because it wasn’t talked much about then. If you could handle yourself socially and you weren’t bouncing off of the walls, you were accepted. What I am learning now is that the constant thinking in my head is really my ADHD and my ability to interact socially is really my ability to mask. So many things are beginning to make sense.

But it is also a time for accepting and forgiving myself. My dreams of a large friendship group really are not realistic for my personality. Taking on multiple projects is not my sweet spot. I do so much better putting my energy into one thing at a time. I might not find connection through the channels everyone else finds successful and that is okay. Most days it feels okay. I am learning who I am when the mask comes off. Most days I like myself.

Early Versions of Lucky Ones

Art Inspired Writing

Lucky Ones

You will never wonder what is wrong with you or where your friends have gone. 

You will not question what you said wrong or how you must have offended them. 

You will not watch tv and be thankful you are not in those situations because no one else has a problem with it.

You will not have to change how much you know because you are starting to get looks as you talk or are seen as an expert with something you know so little about.

You will never have to plan your escape in every social situation because it always hits a point when you need to leave.

You will never walk into a party by yourself because you had no one to go with, but no one noticed. 

You will never eat alone, even though you wanted company because no one thought to ask you.

You will not have to choose your own morals and values over others because they are so different from theirs.

You are mainstream, you are the lucky one.

A Note of Thanks

I would love to hear your thoughts on this piece or any of the others on the website. Creating art and sharing my story is intimidating but so worth the amazing conversations and connections I have found with people. Thank you for being a part of my journey.